Eat Less Dogarnit!

This month's visitor was an overwhelming one that I had by far. Not only it has an unusually heavy flow (especially in my part), but I had these constant urge to eat and eat and eat!! I even have specific cravings and constant eagerness to eat them at a quick! Yesterday it was Loring's Dinuguan and something sweet ( I ended up eating chocolate, which is my classic craving on this time of the month). The other day, I just wanted to eat rice!! Buffet across the street was the perfect solution. The day before that, my cholo kebab wasn't enough so my friend and I went to buy an ice cream and I added shawarma to that. Afterwards, I would feel inevitably sleepy later in the afternoon. Then, at the end of the day, I would feel terribly tired that upon reaching home, I would grab a quick dinner, freshen up and then go to bed. If not for the heavy flow, I would definitely suspect that I could be pregnant (Immaculate conception? Maybe...Maybe not? Scary!!:P)

Just like all the ladies on this planet, one of my New Year's Resolutions was to slim down and lose weight. I've decided to don on a more feminine outfit for a change. Unfortunately, most of the feminine clothes that I like looks better if I were thinner, or worse, it doesn't fit my built, period. Furthermore,I feel practically all my clothes in my rack are shrinking! They're getting tight, especially on the belly part!!(Beer belly? I would still rather think that it is not!) I've been complaining every now and then about my weight and my built, but what can I do? Rather, what more can I do? It is just difficult! All I am constantly doing is wonder (yes, even until now!) how I was able to lose weight almost six years ago without exerting any effort at all? I kinda know for a fact that at that time, I didn't have that much appetite to eat. Now, I can't help but CONSTANTLY wish that I would also lose appetite this year. My brother lost some weight lately and it was because he wasn't eating that much. He and I share the same body structure and metabolism, more or less. If it works for him, then definitely it will work for me too.

But how on earth am I going to lose that freakin' appetite?!

I tried to diet, believe me. We are on a fish diet at home because of my parents' health. We also make sure that there are fruits and vegetables served every meal, which I try to eat as much as I could than meat. I appreciate food with less salt already and I often eat nilaga and sinigang without salt or soy sauce as much as possible. I make sure that I drink lots and lots of water everyday, even if it pains me to frequent the bathroom. I also tried to exercise by taking Tabong ( our beloved 8-year old dog) out for a walk around the neighborhood. I don't even smoke or drink beer that much anymore. Therefore, I am sporting a healthy lifestyle...at least trying to.

But then I realized that my exercise is not enough. Aside from the fact that Tabong has this penchant to crap on the neighbors' yard (which I bet now would give me a negative mark in some houses), she also has this thing to stop first and then walk slowly--somewhat like savoring those moments of freedom. We would run, sure, but it would usually last say, about less than 10 minutes? So much to pump up the adrenaline, right? I am now thinking of buying a jump rope in addition to that walking routine with Tabong. But I am not quite certain if it will be a good one to tone up my belly and butt. They say that going to the gym will be a perfect solution. To be honest, I am tempted to enroll, but my fear is this: if I stop, suddenly stop, I bet I would grow twice as big. Knowing me, I usually don't keep those kind of routines that long. I don't know why. Same thing with taking diet pills. That is definitely the fastest and the easiest way to slim down. But the thing here is, aside from the fact that it is expensive, there is that possibility that it would be harmful to the organs, especially to the liver (although I figured that beer is also harmful to the liver, so what difference would it make?:P)

I also dislike the thought of depriving myself of rice every meal. I am a typical Asian. My meal is never complete without rice. I don't consider eating burger at 12 noon as lunch. So, between burger and rice, I would rather eat rice at that time of the day. Most often, if I am really, REALLY hungry, 1 cup of rice is not enough for me. My mother would constantly remind me to eat 1 cup of rice ONLY! I scowl deeply every time she does that. I just hope that it would ruin my appetite, but sadly, it doesn't affect me, at all.

I have friends who have the same problems as me. That's just the fun part of it. We would talk about it like it is the gravest problem in the world ( I think it indeed is, right?:P). We would try to do something about it, but by the time we meet each other again, we would still end up pigging out and eat and eat and eat! Sigh...

They say that it takes self-control to lose weight. Believe me, even my inner voice is chanting to eat less. Sort of like my pep squad. But at times like these, especially if the hormones have a stronger voice, that chant sounds like a whisper. I even have nice clothes in my rack that doesn't fit me at the moment, but eventually will if I shed just a few pounds. However, here I am still choosing food over those clothes. Looks like I will end up selling them.

What could be the perfect solution here? That I can lose weight without me feeling famished all the time?

I hope it will dawn on me after I finish eating my bar of chocolate.

Toink.